Blow Your Own Damn Mind: How to Turn Yourself On!
Whatever the pleasure, we’re all for it, treasure. But today, we’re going to focus on a different kind of being turned on… like a DIY guideline to turning yourself on, if you will!
And sure, getting sexually excited by your partner(s) is a ton of fun, but wouldn’t it be cool to blow your own damn mind every now and again?
You know, engage in a bit of self-love that entails you really connecting with your body and the many ways that it can get you to feel sexy, attractive, aroused, and amazing? Yay for solo sexy time!
1. Set the Scene
Create an atmosphere that’s warm, inviting, and pleasant. You could take a long bath with sensual add-ons, like a bath bomb or bubble bath, and simply breathe and relax.
Perhaps a glass of your favourite drink in one hand and an erotic novel in the other? Or, light some candles and listen to some of your fave music.
Enjoying a hot bath also has a ton of health benefits like the improvement of blood flow… if you catch our drift.
2. Feel It
It’s said that when we feel comfortable in our clothing, we exude a sense of confidence. And confidence is always sexy, whether you’re in company or enjoying a bit of ‘me’ time.
Find an outfit that makes you feel great… it could be sensual lingerie, a type of clothing in a certain fabric, heels, loose-fitted clothing, no underwear at all, or even being in the nude. You don’t need a special occasion to dress up (or down).
3. Be Seen
You’re fantastic, gorgeous, powerful, dashing, and important… all of you. Take the time to look at yourself in the mirror. Get up close and personal with yourself and admire the things you love about yourself.
You could choose five things you love or find attractive, or simply touch yourself sensually and enjoy how great you feel. When we appreciate our own body, we can get even more turned on alone or with a partner.
The benefits of orgasming are seemingly endless. Did you know that when we climax our bodies release endorphins and oxytocin (the feel-good/love hormone)? This can relieve feelings of anxiety and stress, and can contribute to an overall feeling of wellbeing. Climaxing can also give one’s immune system a boost, and lower our blood pressure.
And what’s even better about receiving these benefits? The fact that there are several different ways to get there! You may have a trusted masturbation technique that works for you every single time… and that’s amazing. But why not experiment a little? You could find alternative styles that get you off even harder.
You could do this by incorporating a sex toy into your masturbation routine, choosing a different place to masturbate, or stimulating different parts of the body. Our sexuality was made for exploring!
5. Embrace Erotica
We’re lucky enough to live in a time where porn, erotic novels and podcasts, and softcore erotica is readily available (largely for free.). And there are so many channels to discover in order to find your sexual muse.
If more hardcore porn is your thing, go ahead and enjoy PornHub, Kink dot com or whatever other site floats your boat. If it’s literature you’re after, hunt down a novel with a blurb that already gets you feeling riled up.
Alternatively, you could check out the work of Erika Lust who promotes feminist pornography, or audiobooks/podcasts like Dipsea.
6. Yearn for Yoga
Yoga may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but according to a few small studies by the National Center for Biotechnology Information, there is actually a link between yoga and sexual functioning.
And while many of these studies are largely non empirical, there are continuous efforts to prove that yoga can alleviate and enhance one’s sex life.
For now however, yoga is all about deep breaths and uninterrupted focus on movement… sound familiar?
Surely you must know what it feels like to hear a song that’s so undeniably sexy that it makes you want to get up and dance (in a provocative manner)? Or maybe you recently saw a music video that got you feeling aroused and you haven’t stopped listening to the song ever since!
Take the time to dance like nobody's watching! Because… no one has to watch! Draw the curtains, close the blinds, lock the door… whatever you need to feel safe and confident. Get dressed up if you fancy, put on your jams and dance!
“Moving your hips and pelvis in a sensual way can be really helpful to embrace your erotic self,” says clinical psychologist and sex therapist, Marianne Brandon, PhD.
8. Racy Reminiscing
Is there an encounter or sexcapade you experienced that gives you an instant libido boost? Lean into it! It’s not about wanting to experience said-encounter again, it’s about tapping into your deepest and most intimate moments that made you feel aroused, powerful, and sensual.
“Letting your mind go there can spark your body and get your mind in the game,” says Brandon.
9. Free Your Fantasies
Oftentimes people tend to feel shame when it comes to their deepest fantasies. Perhaps it’s something society has deemed a ‘taboo’ or maybe it’s just something that appeals to you in theory but that you have no desire to try in real life. And that’s the beauty of a fantasy… it is just that.
Removing shame or guilt surrounding a fantasy, however alternative or mainstream it is, is one of the best ways to truly tap into your sexuality and to experience sexual bliss.
You don’t need to reveal your fantasies to anyone if you’re uncomfortable doing so, but try to embrace them on your journey. Creativity and fantasy are important parts of human functioning and sexuality!
So, million dollar question: are you ready to blow your own damn mind?